shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
