Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
BRING THE BAGELS
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
