i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
