her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
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