Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Randomize
