Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
