I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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