People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
