He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
