i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
