I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
