If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
