Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
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