drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
