I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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