There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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