Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
