Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
