She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
