No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
