drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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