you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I wanna passion pit in your ass
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Randomize
