How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
