Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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