Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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