You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
