I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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