I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
we're making bets on your personal life
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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