Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Fuck appropriateness.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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