just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
