don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
