Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
