Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Randomize
