So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Randomize
