Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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