thus making me awesome and them whores
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
