My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
