I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
