a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
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