I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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