im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
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