I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Randomize