I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
