His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
