Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
