Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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