I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
