That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
