The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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