I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
you mean i was at the winter classic?
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Randomize
